So many times I've thought about coming back here...to give the gremlins a wider space to roam, to express themselves more freely and to gain wisdom once I've heard their sincerest words.
Fuck, but they are loud and ugly and mean and plain old crabby! They won't shut up...I fear their voices are leaking into mine, and I see myself morph into someone I don't like sometimes. More times than I care to admit.
Upon reflecting what my 2014 word would be...Love keeps on knocking. Love instead of anger, frustration, resentment, anxiety, stagnation, painful triggers and raw oozing festering unhealing wounds. I search for the specifics of this Love, how do I access it again...I can't remember beyond fleeting hugs. It feels unobtainable, dying in a barren wasteland because of the poisonous I've set to seed instead.
Not the most cheerful return post...yet it's truthful and worth digging around in to reclaim myself...by listening to my gremlins.
I found you! :)
ReplyDeleteOh, but you've so perfectly written exactly...EXACTLY...why I myself feel drawn to write again. The voices in my head need a place to roam and express themselves! It's the cathartic exorcism, the healing release, brought on by allowing those voices a place to be...and, of course, the love and witness and support offered by those that are listening. xox
Grab a spoon, a shovel whatever is handy and dig.. dig for the gold and uncover that radiant heart of yours! so good to see your words here!
ReplyDeletePlease come back again my dearest one. I miss reading your words, knowing how you're faring, and the blessing of our connection. I have returned to blogging after a long absence due to a health situation. I hope for your return as well. I would love to know how you are doing... Moonshowers of love wrapped in hugs, Momma W'Moon
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